Blessings to you Cary. Such a beautiful image. With love. Donna

All my remembrances of Tav are filled with love and gratitude. Today and always.

Every breathwork and movieyoga I remember Tav and feel his support. I'm blessed I've met him in my life. Thank you, Tav, for all your heart, support, love.

Dearest Cary, Thinking of you at this time and sending you much love.  Whenever dear Tav comes to mind my heart opens with fond memories of his presence and generous heart that he shared with us all. He enriched my life beyond anything I could have imagined for which I am eternally grateful. I remember the one thing that he always said, "trust yourself."
With appreciation for you too dear soul, Cary, for being and all that you do.
Light, love, and may we all know peace in our hearts,
Blessings, Zoë 

Still miss you all the time!

Dearest Cary,
I think and speak of you and Tav so often, but especially on this anniversary date I want to reaffirm my deep love and gratitude for having you and Tav in my life.
Always in my heart.
Donna Rosenthal

I remember Tav telling me before each breathwork “Alls ya gotta do is show up”. He spoken southern. I felt loved and at home. I have never forgotten his words and continue to hear them in my soul.

I was almost 3 months sober when I met Tav in Hampton, VA with Jim & Judith Nourse. My 1st ever Holotropic Breathwork! Amazing. Tav was loving and kind & encouraged me to "keep coming back," a now familiar saying in 12 step recovery. I'm about to celebrate 31 years of sobriety. The work with Tav and Cary and my fellow travelers in the Hotropic realm, has taken me into the space where I now know why I met Tav! To learn to love and value this precious life we've been given, and to cherish the journey toward healing that doesn't exist in our time...but in God's! "Surrender to Healing" is my story. This story continues to unfold. The Breathwork and meditation prepared me for my being able to be present when my mother died. Now I see that her mental illness, not her hatred toward me, was why she locked me in closets and in crawl spaces with mice. I cherish the many times Tav held me while I released so many traumas deeply stored in my body & soul. I'm not so sure I'd be alive today if you, dear Tav, had not loved me unconditionally for our time together. Thank you Tav Sparks ❤️❤️❤️ Love you brother ❤️

Tav, you are always in hour hearts. Two years already. The perpetual light is with you my friend.

Rest in peace & big hugs to Cary

I remember Tav telling us how he stayed on after a breathwork course in a hotel because the woman who had been breathing could not move. She had somehow become paralysed. He told us that he stayed there for another two days until they had helped her through her process. I was touched at his dedication which some course leaders would not even consider.

I was doing my undergrad work in the addictions field & had recently experienced my first HBW session at Esalen. I read an article about a guy in Georgia doing some really innovative work with addicts & HBW so I contacted Christina to say Wow! She informed me that "the guy" had been hired by GTT & was coming to California. I was hooked. Tav has had a special place in my heart since 1987 or so - such compassion & generosity of spirit is so rare but his has transformed so many. I will always love you, Tav, & I send my love to Cary as well. You both changed my life (starting back when I was still Chris-Ann Gordon!) Thank you, thank you!

Remembering you dear Tav today. Every time you come to mind my heart softens and I am thankful for having known you and having received the many blessings and support you gave me and so many others, especially during holotropic breathwork experiences. You were and remain a great gift to all of us.
May peace live in all hearts . . . in fond remembrance and love, Zoë

I remember playing "Ripple" by the Grateful Dead at my certification. As I started I heard Tav say ,"that's one of my favorite songs." I was so honored I don't think I made any mistakes, very unusual :)

Hard to fathom it's been two years. And 8 years since I surfaced from my first BW session to see this man on his knees beside me. In that moment, he taught me the most fluent lesson of all, without uttering a word; to live like Tav. It's time to read "The Power Within" again.

"I would love to live like a river flows, carried by the surprise of its own unfolding." John O'Donohue

Remembering Your Birthday
Miss You, Tav
I am blessed to have had your presence in my life
Sending love to Cary, Bryn and the whole family

Tav’s light will always shine brightly. Much love to Cary and to all who shared in Tav’s wisdom and giant heart.

Tav, missing your light in the world. Feeling love as I remember your fierce love for this entire Holotropic community.

Remembering you, Tav! Your life and work impacted on my live so profoundly.
Sending deep GRATITUDE. I miss you.

Sending much love to Cary, Bryn and the whole family.

Tav, you are and always be forever missed.

I will remember and love Tav all of my days. To have had my path cross with his has been a profound and lasting gift. There is more light in the world because of his presence. 

Dear Tav, Thank you once again for your gentle kindness in teaching me to trust breath, myself, and for bringing me through to know myself more extensively. I treasure the memories of having known you and the blessing that we traveled through life together for a while, always to be held in my heart.
. . . with aloha dear soul, Zoë

I was privileged to meet Tav, even if only for a few days. His light and sound were shared all too briefly here. Observing his birthday, my feeling is that the energy that Tav embodied is something eternal. We need more of such energy and the qualities that he radiated. We need it here and now, but it may serve to special value in other realms. It is certainly not always easy to share our loved ones. May we feel his presence walking beside us without undue strain.

Thank you Tav.

Tav was my roommate in prep school in Virginia. Neither he nor I really fit in but we were best of friends. So sorry to lose him but he was a sweet person , even when I knew him and he was 16.

I first met Tav in 2006 at a training module and was immediately blown away by his presence, his caring, his kindness, and his dedication to and passion for Holotropic Breathwork and to making the world a better place to live in. He was the best teacher that I have ever met whether it was at a Holotropic Breathwork module, at a Movie Yoga module, at my Certification Module or anywhere else. He was one of the inspirational figures in my life and the person who inspired me to become a Holotropic Breathwork Facilitator. To me, he represented compassion, presence and a deep commitment to doing his own inner work and I feel remarkably lucky and honored to have had Tav be my teacher. He was remarkably giving of his time and energy and up until the day he passed away, I always knew that if I had a question about HB Facilitation or about a contraindication or anything else, he would always make himself available to answer it.

In HB Workshops, his ability to work with and stay present with breathers over an extended period of time was remarkable. When a breather needed support and Tav came over, the breather knew that time no longer existed for Tav and that he would stay there as long as necessary to allow the breather to complete his or her process. He was the quintessential model of how a facilitator should be with a breather and he brought that understanding and also his deep understanding and trust of the "Inner Healer" to me and into the entire HB facilitator training program.

His book, "The Power Within", which he published last year, is one of the most profound books that I have ever read and is a testament to personal empowerment and transformation and his deep commitment to his own inner work. He writes:

"Engaging in any systematic deep work over a period of time will almost certainly reveal to us a way to find a true lasting freedom, independent of outside circumstances..within us all along has been a force more powerful than any the outside world can offer...this unlimited power is none other than the Inner Healer, or what we also call, in our inquiry, the power within."

This is a deep and profound loss for me. The world has lost a beautiful soul.

One thing I loved about Tav that he really embraced all there was in being human. He really helped me to understand and embody what wholeness was really all about. When I was in a particular challenging place he would speak to me in a language I loved – Myth. In True Lord of the Rings style he said:

“Like Samwise Gamgee told Frodo, when they were in Mordor, and they were looking down on an army of 10,000 orcs between them and mount doom, "There's nothing for it..." like, we got no choice but to go down this hill and keep on doing it...and that's what they did, and they got there, and after frodo came flying out of mt doom, and it was all crashing down around them, you know, his face was all lit up again, and he said, "It's gone -- it's done -- I can see the shire..."so, when i'm in my own version of your place, i think of this, and truth be told, it will shift -- it always does. all i can do is tell you what i see: i feel i know your heart and soul -- and when i see you, or think of you, i see the depth of you, who you really are, and i have no worries about you at all from that place.”

These words still resonate with me often. What a gift among many other gifts. I honestly feel like one of the lucky ones having known him. So I can’t really say enough but this will do for now. From your swan tattoo, your wild shirts, southern accent and Gieger skull ring, I love you. Rest well in the Beloved. You will be missed greatly.

Wild Rice casserole. He brought wild rice casserole to Thanksgiving and then regaled me with the care and ingredients that were in it - many deriving from home in Macon and some from the hippy-dippy farmer's market. But in that way that dish was all Tav. And he was curious - always wanting to know more about things he knew and things he didn't and I love that about him. And his hugs. It's rare that people who are not my immediate family will hug me the way he did because of my size but he hugged completely and unabashedly...like he lived the rest of his life. That wild rice casserole was the best I've ever had, before or since because it was all him. That's what I will remember fondly is the way he brought all of himself to every interaction and every moment...I am sad we don't have him on this planet anymore but sure do like imagining he and my mom laughing and cooking together. May you find peace in the sorrow.

Dear Tav,
I am grateful that you came into my life at the GTT module "the power within" in Csech Republic. It was my first module ever a few weeks after my first double breathwork at peace castle in Austria. It had saved me from a deep crisis after my mother's passing. I remember this inspiring practise of Movie yoga, your teachings of the yoga of the cross, your loving and strong presence in the breathwork sessions, your humorous and honest telling of your life story, how you struggled with addiction and overcame it. I remember your bright and encouraging look when I asked for admission to the GGT as you said "welcome, go for it". I remember the following hug holding your tender body, so fragile and though so strong. I remember your basic teaching: support, support, support. I remember your closing: completion within the incompletion. I had expected to do the certification closure with you. this is not possible anymore in physical reality. your spirit is still here in my heart and always will be. but I miss you as a whole human being so that makes me feel sad. 

Dear Tav,
I had the privilege and joy to meet you once in Kildare, Ireland in November 2012 in the enchanted Shell Cottage, where you shared with us the magic, wisdom and ingenious teaching of Movie Yoga, and yourself. I hold this weekend, hosted by Geoff Fitzpatrick, deep in my heart, and continue to keep the Movie Yoga teachings alive in my life and work. It was only the day before Cary sent out the email about your passing that your teaching on Will and Grace popped into Consciousness as I walked down a path, and I smiled, outwardly and inwardly. a profound teaching I walk with everyday.

I smile now, as I look at all the photos shared, and the abundance of a life fully lived - the greatest gift we can give.

I recall you saying that weekend how you loved Swans, and how blessed you had felt to see one that morning. Your love of swans brings forth a beautiful quote from a lesser known John O'Donoghue poem, that in many ways, speaks of BPM II, and the pointing back to the mystery of the Who that we really are.
In deep love, le gra an domhain.
Julie

Exiled Clay  

I am not sure you
live here anymore, no cord
of clay holds
you moored.

The air is brittle
and cannot settle
near your attention.

Your call has
no cloister , for
abandon anoints you.

To what place
belongs the red bush
of your blood?

Who could travel
your mountains of dream,
glimpse gazelles
limp towards dawn,

see flowers
thirst through earth
for dew,

and hear at last
the sound
of swan's wings
bless the dark?

John O'Donoghue, Echoes of Memory

My first encounters with Tav were early on in Omega and Kripaulu. He was with Stan and Christina and seemed to be someone up there, almost untouchable. Many years later, I decided to try to understand more about Holotropic Breathwork so I signed up for the Holotropic Paradigm and Tav was the teacher of that module. I really learned about the INNER HEALER from Tav theoretically and experientially as he helped me with a breather. His presence with me was that of one who witnessed and recognized the power of the inner healer. He knew this breather and let her INNER HEALER do the work. I continue to trust my Inner healer. Some time after Tav said ‘You are a natural for this work. Have you considered the training”. I took this message seriously after feeling his presence during that experience. 
There were a few other encounters with Tav but the two that are a part of how Tav conveyed a oneness with life was at certification process in July of 2019 when his illness was obvious but his was still so present when my music was being played.  His tuning in to the room was so exquisite. He indicated at what level the volume should be played with such detail.  He was so attuned and so present to the energy in the room. He sat in the back and raised his hands each time he felt a change in volume was necessary. 
The third experience with Tav was at my certification meeting. When He asked what I was going to do after the module. I told him that I would be helping to facilitate with Tim O’Connell and Oliver Williams. He said “those guys need you. They need your feminine presence.” He affirmed the need for the feminine. Tav frequently talked about the divine feminine. To me this recognition on his part came from deep within his own unity with his feminine soul that made him the WHOLE PERSON he takes into this next phase of his life.
Tav, I had so few encounters with you but you have entered my heart and I do hope that you will continue to be with me. Love you. Peg

Tav made me feel safe when what I was feeling was in no way safe. His kind eyes and deep, gentle smile made it easier to progress in my breathwork sessions. He allowed me to learn to save my own life and to move well beyond that in my journey. He was my tipping point into joy and wholeness. I could never thank him adequately.

I've just learned of Tav's death two weeks after the fact. I'm grateful for the time without his loss.

Cary, your letter is gorgeous and inspired. He was blessed to have you as his partner in crime and love all these years. Just as we were to have him as a teacher. Thank you for sharing him with us so generously.

Gentle as you go.

Carol Ann

My first time I met Tav was in San Francisco at my first introduction to Stan Grof and Holotropic Breathwork. Friday evening, I wondered into the room where Tav was setting up his presentation on Movie yoga. When I walked into the room, feeling a bit out of sorts, Tav came up to me and greeted me with a warm smile. The next day, towards the end of my breathwork session, I was struggling with falling asleep after an energetic session. Tav had bad knees and had announced at the start that he may not be able to get down and do body work. In spite of his knees, he came by my space, lay down beside me and asked how I was doing. I said I was struggling with falling asleep. And in his cheerful and supportive way he said, "Go ahead, fall asleep!" That is the loving Tav that I came to know over the next several years.
I will miss him.

Ocmulgee National Monument

We eager children
came to know spirits on sacred ground—
mound builders and before—
ancient in ways of seeing and being—
We carried gifted secrets into a profane world
and to our forever lives—
We are children of the mounds and the woods—
Voices of those before us join—
Now in spirit we are one.

Dear Tav, Dear Brother,

I give thanks for our time on this earth together.
For our play and laughter
For our talk and soul searching
For your wisdom
For what you have taught me about being strong
For your gentle spirit
For your loving spirit
For sharing together so deeply ourselves, our lives
You will be with me always.

Love,
Jackie

Tav, what a blessing I had a chance to meet you. Thank you for being you and thank you for passing down so much love. It stays forever present and alive as we will keep passing it further. ❤️

A very sad time.
In the last few days the memories have come flooding back.
Meeting Tav was a real privilege. The occasions were sometimes far between, but each was a special one, filled with a sense of connection and support. Unforgettable moments in my holotropic journey.
His lectures, his passion, his humor, the music and dance and the movies. His presence.
I am deeply touched, more than words can say.
With much love.

I have a cherished memory of Tav from when I was going through the GTT training and the first Lord of the Rings movie was just released. It was in the more casual time at the end of our opening circle that someone in the group asked him what he thought about the movie and he shared that he was thrilled with it. Tav spoke about several different scenes and at one point he paused to choke back tears as he recalled a particular scene that deeply moved him.

It was the chase scene in which Arwen on horseback carries wounded Frodo to safety as she swiftly and courageously outrides the Black Riders across a river. Although the Black Riders are thwarted, Frodo is near to death from his wound and struggling for his life. Arwen, with intensity and deep compassion prays; “What grace has given me, let it pass to him …. let him be spared …. save him!”.

As Arwen was to Frodo … Tav was to those of us in his charge …he protected us as we explored the vast terrain of our inner psyches during our breathwork sessions; he held us with his prayer of grace as we wrestled with the pain of our own wounds and darkness. He inspired us toward the light of life through his care and genuine goodness. He was a dedicated and true warrior of healing. I am forever grateful to have known him.

Swift passage to the undying lands of Valinor dear Tav …. A Elbereth Gilthoniel!

I am immensely grateful to have known Tav as a person, facilitator and teacher. His heartfelt wisdom, love, teachings, humour and story telling are what stays with me.

Wishing you love, light and peace for this journey, captain!

“All that you touch you Change.
All that you Change changes you.
The only lasting truth is Change.”
― Octavia E. Butler

It's been so many decades since I met Tav, yet I clearly recall an extraordinary quality of light that he not only radiated, but in fact was. His boundless enthusiasm and energy, he greeted each moment as a miracle, with wonder. It's now decades ago, since I was with either of you, my heart is touched by the openness and depth of your sharing, Cary. I have no doubt that Tav is flying with the angels. I wish you, Cary, love and support during this time in your journey.

"... this ephemeral episode of human experience - this momentary candle, lit from the eternal flame, and blown out by the Mystery when its time is done."
The words you wrote at the end of your book, Tav - 'The Power Within.' When I read your words the first time, they landed in my heart, and re-reading them they bring ease to the loss of your presence in our midst.
So many good memories, and I'm grateful for the many opportunities to work with you over the years - you always offered a surprising and significant gem that has made me a better facilitator, and person.
My love, Cary, and a bow to you for the huge and loving walk that you have taken over these years alongside your beloved.

I was so sad to hear Tav had passed on - I wasn't expecting it and would have loved to spend more time with him. I really appreciated his authenticity, gentle, kind and comical spirit. And, how in touch he was with himself and each of us. I felt I was with a trusted brother the first time I met him. He's an inspiration to me on how to be - "comfortable in my own skin"

Cary and the Holotropic family - I wish you and yours all the best in adjusting to his passing.

Much Aloha

I met Tav at my very first GTT training in the Czech Republic. The module was “The Power Within”. I really didn’t know exactly what I had signed up for, nor did I know much about Holotropic Breathwork. I was absolutely blown away by the integrity Tav exuded. He embodied the teachings from which I came and then wove them so beautifully into the Holotropic experience. “Follow the breather”, so simple and yet so deeply profound.

“The clearer we can see who we are the better we can help others see who they are. The best thing you can do for a breather is to continue to work on yourself and not fall prey to guru status.” This was repeated by Tav over and over. The last bit of wisdom he gave me was, “Our job is to keep this process as pure as we can. I don’t see a model that is better.”

Thank you Tav for touching my heart and planting a little bit of your wisdom within.

I am deeply grateful to have experienced Tav’s huge-hearted, authentic presence during a couple of modules - and especially, as part of the certification community last summer. I hold dear numerous poignant moments of connection with him, in consultation and on the floor, when I felt completely seen, heard, encouraged, empowered. What a teacher. What a spirit. I bow to Tav and Cary for their commitment to offer such high-calibre training. The Holotropic Breathwork journey has been profound for me so far, a life-changer.

With deepest gratitude to you dear Tav for all the love you brought through and shared taking us deep within to 'trust.' Out on my balcony, your spirit in the form of a seagull soared overhead when we bid each other farewell. As I breathe you are 'home' now in Spirit, always to be treasured in my heart. May you rest in Peace dear Forever Friend.

And dear Cary and all HB folks who supported Tav in 'the work,' may we each find peace in our hearts over time. Mahalo Nui Loa with Aloha Blessings.

Bless you Tav. It's been real. What a ride, eh?

I was so fortunate to do breathwork with Tav a few years ago and spend heart-opening individual time with him. During those encounters we shared some startling synchronicities that led Tav to tell me some things I shall not forget, including that we will meet again. He truly 'saw' me. Only a handful of experiences in life have been like that. Cary, I hold a sacred opening for you in your sadness but also the joy you have had with Tav.

You will live on, in the music, in the brilliant sets that you created, that have accompanied so many of us on our largest journeys. Thank you for every   song and every note.

Sending warm virtual hugs to Cary and Bryn. I know Tav will be sorely missed.

Much Love,

Allyn & Larry

TRIBUTE TO A WARRIOR OF LIGHT

    “Bearing witness is an aggressive act. It is born out of a refusal to bow 
     down to outside pressure to revise or to repress experience, a decision
     to embrace conflict rather than conformity, to endure a lifetime of anger
     and pain rather than submit to the seductive pull of revision and
     repression. Its goal is change.”  -Kali Tal-

I have tried to write something that could capture my feelings for at least a week and have been left with the utter inadequacy of words, the boots of time frozen in place, sadness rolling into me when I least expect it, catching the edges of my breath folding me sharp as origami tucked in at the corners.

Tav Sparks (Sargent Sparks, the "Skinny Man”) was one of the most powerful teachers in my life. I had faced tanks while trooping through post-war counties, thinking all the while that I was brave. But sometimes courage is more subtle. It can reside in the still moments waiting for witness. I’m so grateful that Tav was a fierce warrior of light, holding space for all the torrents emerging... the width and breadth of the anger, depth of terror and grief, eruptions of joy. He trusted that healing would come even when I couldn’t imagine it and didn’t understand. And yet through all that, the first lesson was born...”Healing is possible.”

What a great privilege to have known him. My favorite memory was during a workshop in Phoenicia, New York, while sitting for someone and staring out the windows and into the trees cradling our space with shocks of green buried at the root. All of sudden my body shuddered with a knowing that I couldn’t avoid...every cell thundering, “In the end, there is only love.” I couldn’t stop shaking and crying. Tav came over, leaning in, wide-eyed, smiling, waiting while the music pulsed the floor. I told him what I felt, the inside truth turning out. “YES, YES!” he yelled, like a little kid who had discovered where all the treasures where buried. A facilitator put an index finger to her lips but Tav was excited now and in that charming southern drawl he whispered, “you got this, girl...that’s exactly right...stay with that” as I continued to sob at the incredible beauty. The second lesson.....”in the end there is only love.”

And so now the world is a little less bright for his absence. And yet I know his radiance and courage lives in the thousands of people believed and witnessed around the world. For me, that’s where the sacred lies. Not in reverence for the abstract divine, existing way out there somewhere but in the messy business of being deeply human. Tav showed up time after time, without promise, without guarantees, trusting in the mystery of the inner healer, despite the lessons of loss and challenges cautioning him to be wary. Despite these things, he showed up anyway, ready, expectant, deeply committed to the possibility of transformation when it is wasn’t always visible or obvious. Thank you Sargent Sparks, for all your incredible bravery, for your steadfast belief in the best of human beings, and for your commitment to love without promise of return. I will remember you always and am forever changed for your abiding kindness. May you be free from all constraints if this life. When I visit old oak trees, sturdy in the storms I will know you are near or see the aspen leaves waving their golden leaves in concert, I’ll feel you close. Sleep well and gently in the arms of all that is sacred and in the great mystery of the divine, forever.

What comes to mind most, when I think of Tav, is vast generosity--generosity of teaching, care, and service. I learned so much about facilitation from him, including the most valuable (and hardest) lesson: doing not-doing. The way he embodied both trust and grace has guided me through many challenging situations, and I am deeply grateful to have met him and been trained by him. I am sure his teaching and spirit will continue to heal and inspire so many.