October 23, 2022
October 23, 2022
This man took on another man’s daughter as his own…me. He made it clear that I was just as much his child as his biological sons. Through many times in my life where I reacted and acted out in ways that were painful, my Dad loved and accepted me. He was an exemplary model for how a Dad can hold space for a daughter to be her own source of power and wisdom.
Even though it was clear he knew the answer to my life dilemma, he would not just tell me. He would ask me lots of questions that helped me realize it myself. (My clients who see this same trait in me…here is where that comes from.)
My Dad respected me, even when it got really, really challenging to hold that line because of how I was acting.
He never once put me down or dismissed me or called me names. He would never call me “a lost cause” even when it certainly appeared what I was. Instead, he looked deep into the center of me and called that part of me forward when it was clear my ego had me by the tail.
I’ve always been an intense and dramatic person, and my Dad helped me temper that without destroying my fire. He taught me how to restrain myself and bring the frenetic energy into stillness. How did he teach me? Through what I thought was torture at the time. He brought me and my mom sailing on our small sailboat every weekend the weather allowed it. All three of us would read books out on the boat in the quiet of the water, and then play gin rummy…
Which leads me to winning with grace. My Dad taught me not to gloat when I win. He could detect even the slightest hint of feeling better than the others, or being happy because I defeated everyone. If I was just happy with myself when I won, my Dad rewarded that with first pick out of the candy bag.
My Dad was such a powerfully special person that he can never be replaced by anything nor anyone. While I love everyone in my family, my Dad owns a piece of my heart that only he can fill.
Five years since you transitioned Dad. I miss you so much and think of you every single day. I feel you by my side, I hear your corny jokes and big belly laugh of delight, and I only wish I had more videos of you so I can recapture you living and breathing.
You are totally my hero.
Even though it was clear he knew the answer to my life dilemma, he would not just tell me. He would ask me lots of questions that helped me realize it myself. (My clients who see this same trait in me…here is where that comes from.)
My Dad respected me, even when it got really, really challenging to hold that line because of how I was acting.
He never once put me down or dismissed me or called me names. He would never call me “a lost cause” even when it certainly appeared what I was. Instead, he looked deep into the center of me and called that part of me forward when it was clear my ego had me by the tail.
I’ve always been an intense and dramatic person, and my Dad helped me temper that without destroying my fire. He taught me how to restrain myself and bring the frenetic energy into stillness. How did he teach me? Through what I thought was torture at the time. He brought me and my mom sailing on our small sailboat every weekend the weather allowed it. All three of us would read books out on the boat in the quiet of the water, and then play gin rummy…
Which leads me to winning with grace. My Dad taught me not to gloat when I win. He could detect even the slightest hint of feeling better than the others, or being happy because I defeated everyone. If I was just happy with myself when I won, my Dad rewarded that with first pick out of the candy bag.
My Dad was such a powerfully special person that he can never be replaced by anything nor anyone. While I love everyone in my family, my Dad owns a piece of my heart that only he can fill.
Five years since you transitioned Dad. I miss you so much and think of you every single day. I feel you by my side, I hear your corny jokes and big belly laugh of delight, and I only wish I had more videos of you so I can recapture you living and breathing.
You are totally my hero.