Oh God help me please give me the strength to keep living for my other children and grandbabies... Travis Dean I can't believe it 730 days 24 months 2 years God I can't breathe I just can't fathom this anymore everyone tells me I'm one of the strongest women they know, but truth is I'm not strong at all I just make others believe I am cus I get tired of hearing, you need to get over it, u need to move on, Travis wudnt want to see you like this.... Well I can't move on get over or even live hardly this is one unexplainable unbearable unimaginable most hurtful ever possible for a human soul to endure and the slowest cruelest death ever possible.. I wud rather be stabbed slowly in every inch of my body the have to live without one of my kids and unfortunately this is the life God has chosen for me to live but this isn't fair to my son or his son in if we were loved by our father that we grew up believing then how can u let ur child be in such a horrible state of mind in such a lost soul if u love me and have the power to make it all go away and give me back my baby.... Travis I just want to hold you, love you, look at you, smell you, touch you, hear your heart beat, again that's not to much to ask for I'm so sick of this feelings Rest Easy Travis Dean My Angel Baby until we meet again Fly High my luv we will be together again soon