I So miss you Chad, and now mom is with you. so that makes me feel better.

Happy 50th Birthday Chad I so Miss you .

I miss you daddy, my baby was suppose to be in my arms the same day you left this earth 10 years ago, i dont have you or my baby, i am very depressed. I wish you were here so much. God I miss you so much everyday. I wish you could call me everyday, youd have a lot to make up for. it hurts so much daddy, you being gone from me. Its selfish but I need you.

I love you forever and always.

Chaddy, it has been 10 years scince you left me, I will never forget me rocking in my embrace, kissing you good by, I think of you every day all the time, I miss you so very much, you were always here to see us, always helping everybody. The space left here by you leaving is unbearable, I love you so my boy, what a wonderful gift you were to me, know that I love you so much & the time I will be coming to be with you is getting closer. Thank you precious Jesus & my Heavenly Father for my Chad, I know he also belongs to you, thank you for using me to put him on this earth for awhile & allowing me to have him to love & know him & his happy ways, always making us happy & laugh, the sweet little boy he was, let him know how much we love him, be with his little girl, Amen!

Chad I miss you so Much. I so miss our times together. I'm taking care of myself . When I leave this world I know I will see you again,

My Precious Jesus, I miss my Chad so much the pain is almost too great to handle sometimes. May I get to be with him & you , help me to not sin, to be good & love everyone, I thank you & our Heavenly Father for all the wonders he has given us, forgive me my hardness & make me kinder & good so I may be with you forever & my son & Parents, all I have loved, animals included, In Jesus name, Amen

there is snow on the ground & the sun is shining, it reminds me of you, how you loved to drive crazy in the snow. You always scraped our side walks, I miss you so, if you were here I'd make our special soup & bake some bread to go with it. I still remember your, so good, homemade chile & all the fun we used to have in your little house, That house hand set vacant for so very many years but you worked so hard to bring it back to life, it is still in very nice shape a young Man lives in it he has painted the outside, put in a new wall furnase, only wish you had never left me & were still here, I ask God to be with you, forgive him his sins, I love him Jesus, I love you & Jesus. Thank you for all you have given me. Bless My husband & children Amen

I have been having such sadness, even my dreams are sad, it seems no one wants to talk with me about you except Joey & sometimes Tim, it helps me to talk about our times with you, there were so many good ones. Then there were the so sad ones at the end, you were so very sick, if only there had been a way to save you. It to this day still seems impossible you are gone from me here til God takes me home, I can barely stand it, life was so happy for me when you were here to share it with us, now it seems so empty & sad your precious girl moved clear to Florida, I will hardly get to see her any more.

the Holidays are over, I am glad, I thank our Lord for the memory of his birth, the chance for salvation, I thank you also for the precious ones you have given me, also the ones who are now with you waiting in peace & love, I miss them so much but the older I get the more i realize it will not be long til i am with you all waiting for the Holy wonderful resurrection, My Chad was such a light in my life, I gave birth to him, I love him so, I thank you for the time you gave me with him! I see the big pretty grain semis like you drove Chad,Curly.
It always reminds me so much of you, you loved to drive them & were so very good at it! Not many right here about my boy, but I know people loved him & think of him often.

you are in my mind & in my heart as always, Fall will be here soon, Halloween was always such fun for you, I am going to celebrate this year in your honor, give out candy have already decorated. I will never for get dressing you boys up & taking you for trick or treat, I pray I would have done better at raising you, I tryed but drinking was always part of every family thing, I did it too, if only I could make sure God will forgive me for this, my biggest sin, you were my most precious gift, I should have not let you be around all the bad stuff involved in our family, Please forgive me God, Jesus help me & Chad

The harvest flys are singing. dusk is starting ,my flowers look so pretty, I wish them all for you my son, reminds me of all the wonderful times we had here in the summer, you were always the grill chef, making such good food, making us all happy & laughing. Life is so different now, so lonely & quiet, I am glad to see Lavonna wrote you a note, for you never got over loving her, If it only could have turned out good, I love you so Chaddy, Your Mom

Dear husband and best friend you made me feel like I was the most important person in your life and you always made me laugh every single day every time I heard your voice and every time I saw you from the first day we met till the day you left me alone my heart always I mean every single time my ❤ always did the good hurt I know you know cuz you said the same of me and you were my everything and my nothing and my everybody and my nobody. only you and I know what that means you did things for me that never has and never will ever do you always made me feel like a Queen you really surprised me the day you took me to your church ⛪ and said you have to marry me today on my 18th cuz you couldn't wait till our 1st anniversary which is August 8 1984 and you always made me feel important the day you died my ❤ felt like it was blowing up I my dad Ralph Lane and asked him if he had talked to you or sern

My Chad I went to our old Church today, I felt you there the whole time, I remember you being the alter boy, you used to go with me sometimes before you went to Heaven. Thank you Jesus for this, bless me my boy & all my family, I can smell incense as I type this, thank you my Lord.

My Chaddy boy you have been so deep in my heart & mind today, I had a good cry it helps releive the pain some. You were the best, all the cards you gave me always said you were bad my bad son & what a good Mom I was, I wasn't good enough to save you, you always were shareing & for giving to others, always helping us & others, I am old & not good health now, I miss you so, I know if you were here I wouldn't be so lonely. I think of you so very often, we drove by our grave marker yesterday, it is very beautiful, we will be there togethr one day, the real part of us will be joined with us at the reserection, Oh to see our Jesus, you my Mom & Dad & Grandpa, for ever no more pain or shame my boy, I pray for us, know I love my Boy & Mom & you Jesus, so very much, help me, come to me, be in my heart,Amen

I have you in my heart so much lately Chady, you have been gone so long but it still hurts the same even more the reality is so true now. I think of that last time I rocked you in my arms in that ER, you asked me to rub your back, I wish now I would have gone with you, I could have had a few more hours with you, forgive me for not being there, God I sk you to please love our boy please forgive him his sins for he had good in him, please let us be together, when we met in the skys to join you & recieve our new Bodies! Thank you for the time I had with my boy, help me bare this Jesus, I think of how your Mother hurt so at your cucifitction. Bless us Lord for Chad always believed strong in you as i do, Amen

it has been very hard these last weeks, your birthday the hoildays you always enjoyed so much, they are not happy like they were when you were with us, I talked to Wyatt yesteday he is missing you just as Joey & I are, you always loved Halloween, Thanksgiving & Christmas,, your last ones were spent in the hospital so ill, you left to be with Jesus before Christmas. It still does not seem possible you are gone, Your are in my heart & thoughts always I love you so. I read the sweet, cute cards you gave me thanking me for all I did, I just wish I could have done more, I wanted you to have a full happy long life, I have bad heart trouble now so it may not be too long til I will be with you & my Mom & Dad & Precious Jesus, I remember each hair cute I gave you, all the clothes i bought & sewed you, our trips to Colo, you being the chef of all our cook outs, how happy I always was to see you waiting for me on the porch, you watching TV with us, helping your Pop in the garage, cleaning the snow for us rakeing the leaves for us, it has not been raked since you left us. Sometimes I can not stand it, my special one is not with me now, kiss grandma for me I miss her so much, she loves us all so much. bye for now Chaddy, your Mom

Happy Birthday my precoous Chaddy, this has been such a hard day, rememberig your birth, you were so tiny & special. You remaind special all through your life, I feel such loss, it sufficates me ypour leaving us, I hate it so it is so lonely for me & joey, we miss you so. I finally got a tomd stone put up at the cemetery for you & your Dad & me. it is so pretty, we desgined it, has your Truck on the back, if you were only here I would help you getyour own truck. I am so sorry I didn't have this money to share when you were with me, know it would have helped you just like the other kids, I took you a beautiful rose today & birthday balloon, Colo stones & a tiny truck Joey bought you at Christmas, Rest in peace my love, Joey & I keep yo in our hearts all the time

Happy Birthday Bro and big hugs. I miss you so much Chad.It gets so lonely without you here. its hard to believe you have been 46 years old, I will always remember you as my little brother. you would follow me when you were little when I was a teen I would take you with me to Dodge City, we would go to boot hill and the army surplus store . Those were fun times. Then you you had a daughter and got married I was so happy for you you were such a smart young man, you were the youngest person in Kansas to get a CDL and you did it on you first try. You love trucks so much. I when you were little you would watch the Convoy, Smokey and the Bandit all the time you even had a toy CB and a toy Rubber Duck Mack truck. I so miss you Chad. All my love from your older brother Joe

Well I made it through my heart valve replacement so far, it is hard going to Wichita, for this is where you left this earth, I wonder what your last thoughts were before they put you out, I pray it was praying to Jesus for for giveness & acceptence, for you love Jesus, you believed, I also am sure you were thinking of your family, we love & miss you so. They are working on our stone now, it will be so beautiful, you will rest between your Pop & I. The stone has a beautiful truck on the back with your name Curly, in rememberence of how you loved to drive the big rigs. The front has beautifu Mountains, I saw you there in a dream. Thank you for my boy God, thank you Jesus for giving him a chance at salvation, I love you God, I am not afaird any more & Jesus, you are my love,please take in my boy & let him & us be with you forever, AMEN

hi my darling Chady, I am home from the fisrt of my heart surgeries, it seems unfair you could not have made it home from yourssus please kiss my boy for me tell him how much I love him, love you so Jesus thank you for the most precious gift of all, salvation, please I ask for no gold or riches just you my family & my pets, my tiny tilda left me I pray she waits with all my fur babies, thank you for sharing them with me!

Hello my Boy, i have accomplished getting out tomb stone all ready, it is beautiful, the mts on the front, with us 3 & a peterbuilt on the back with your "Curly" under it. we will all 3 be remembered here, I love you so, thank you Jesus for letting us have this memorial for this place. I have to have a heart valve replaced & one stent, I am not as brave as you were with your surgeries, but if it should fail, I will be with you, my Mom & Dad & most of all My jesus. Thank you Father God for all these blessings, be with me, make my faith strong, Amen

Wyatt had your portrait painted for my Mothers day gift, it took my breath away, looks so much like you Chaddy, I wish we could spend Mothers day together I love & miss you so, I know you are with Jesus waiting for the reserrection, I wish I knew if you are sonsious & Happy, I think you are from what I have read in the bible, I pray we will be together with Jesus again!

Oh Jesus I have been missing my Chad so much, please let him know how much I love & miss him. I love you Jesus with all my heart, I know my boy was ready to come home to you, he was so sick & had made so many mistakes he was so sorry for, watch over him precious Jesus til I get there, AMEN

Here it is the middle of January, I have had you in my heart & on my mind so much lately, I miss you so, I have to be content with your photos, phone message & all the precious memories of our time together. Your Lindsey girl came over last night & had pot roast with us, I wish you were still here to share our meals. I always think of you when we eat, you loved my cooking so much. Lindsey was just telling me she likes liver too, just like you. Jesus watch over my boy, let him know how i still love him & thank you for sharing him with me, watch over his precious daughter Amen

The holidays are nearly over, only New Year remains, Christmas & Thanksgiving were so sad with out you Chaddy. Making us laugh, helping me cook & clean up, it will never be happy again without you, we love you so, we pray you are at peace with Jesus in Paradise, you were so brave, such Faith, you gave me such joy while you were here, I forgive anything you ever did & please Jesus forgive my boy & I for love is so strong. You died & suffered for us so we can be with you & all the good people we love here, My Boy realized this he had faith, please bless him & my family so we may all be together for ever in light & love!

Not a day goes by I don't think of Ya. The world is so lonely without you in it .

today is your Birthday, it is so very sad, yet so special for it is the day God gave you to me, I shall never forget how tiny & precious you were, how sick you were,, we spent many hours together you sleeping next to me. God gave us 38 years 2 months & 2 days with you, such wonderful days, there was hard times but we always healed. You going to be with Jesus is one thing that is so very hard to heal. I drove past where you were born last night where i brought you home, oh the sweet memories. I am getting old so is your Pop, we will be with you & Jesus soon. Jesus please let us know each other, My Heavenly Father, may we keep our loved ones in Paradise, you sent me messages from Chad to let Him go but I saw him happy & at peace, please Lord...let my whole family be so blessed.In Jesus name amen

Fall is in the air, so lovely, we have been missing you so much Chaddy, why did you leave us, we love you so much, I pray where you wait in paradise you know how much you are loved & missed, every hr of everyday. Your precious baby girl lives here now, I am so thankful to get to have this time with her, she just wishes you were here for her, she has no brothers or sisters, you being gone leaves a hugw hole in her heart, We love her some much, for she is part of you. such a good, smart pretty girl. Jesus, help us all, Amen

It is so hot
today I remember when you would drive your big grain truck in such hot weather, with the chaf from the grain making your skin raw, I used to take you lunch at the storage place, I also remember your Pop starting your truck for you on your way to work so it would be warm for you. My yard needs racked so bad, I remember how you always racked it for us. Helped your POP in the garage, would come see me everyday, fix some rice & always bring a bowel to me too. I love you so, it sufficateds me I can hardley live with it, my precious Jesus please help me,

I am tired Tim & I are trying to get our home in better order, Your Pop cleaned the patio, It reminds me of you so much, you always racked & cleaned our yard, shoveled the snow, helped me with all our big family dinners. Called me & usually came to see us every day, Oh how I miss you I can hardly stand it, I know you are fine with Jesus but this place is so empty without you! The time is passing fast soon I will be able to be with you & Jesus & Mom, Lindsey is moving home I am so Happy she is all I have left of you. RIP my darling, remember my love, Mom

I had my back surgery, am slowly getting better, have been missing you a lot scince I have gotten home, the longing to see you hug you hear your voice is with me all the time. Know that I love you more than I can say, thank you for all the pretty cards you got me the wonderful things you wrote on them, I have kept them & read them, it reminds me of our precious times together.

I miss you so much, I was very angry that you left, I am working on getting over that. I don't want to be angry with you, but it hurts and its so hard without you. I want to call and talk to you all the time. I love you daddy...

I miss you daddy, this time of year is very hard in our family without you. I love and miss you a lot and I need you here right now.

I am thinking of you Chaddy, I just talked to your precious Daughter, I love her so much & so does your Pop, we wish she lived closer, we miss her so. Lindsey is a blessing left to us by our Lord, we have you through our Doll. I will always remember rocking you in my arms that last day, you telling me you wouldn't get to see her again, Oh this is just too hard, Little Lindsey wanted you here to see her be a woman , she is such a good one, she has traits like you, a good heart, so smart.

my precious son, I look at your photos everyday & often listen to your voice. It keeps you with me in a way, I was just thinking you would be 44 yrs old now, you would have been a wiser smarter man, but you are with our amazing Savior, free from this evil worlds woes. It is a beautiful fall day, you would have been here to visit, the Holidays are coming up, you loved them so, Halloween was always fun here, you were a riot as a child then as a man you always bought candy & gave it out for us such fun. I have you a beautiful fall bouquet & a cute little pumpkin, Freda goes to Matt's grave almost everyday, we both lost our baby boys, so close, so special. I take good care of your little girl & your brothers I only miss being able to by you a gift, You are in a place, these worldly gifts would mean not much, just know I still pray for you, & love you beyond belief, my Chaddy!~*~

I love you Chad, i remmember this day so well, I was so Happy you were finally here with me, to care for & love! Jesus if my boy can nothear pleaselet him know I still think of him all the time & love him so & hope with all my heart he is resting with you like you showed me, thank you for having him,Amen

Happy Birthday my Chaddy, it is so sad not having you here today, I could made you your liver & onions & cheese cake, buy you a shirt like i always did. I will remember the times you were here with me & thank our lord for those. I know you are now in no pain or unhappiness, you are in the best place of all, I thank our Lord for giving us the chance for salvation, such a wonderful gift, thank you Jesus for all you have done for us, help me, you are the one I should be listening too, Iwill start doing my best! My Lord & Savoir I Love you so, Amen in your name!

We had a busy day cleaning, you would have helped us if you were here. The pain never gets better, I am trying to realize you are in a far better place, I am glad you are out of the pain you had in this life, I so wish it could have been different, but all will be well on the other side with you & Mom Jesus... what a joy it will be to see you again. Thank you Jesus for giving us the precious gift of salvation, help me to be strong, thank you for all the wonders you have allowed me, Amen~

My boy you are so in my heart today, I was just looking t poky feeders, thinking how many trips you made there, I wish so I would have went or a ride with you in your truck, I miss you so, Jesus please let him know how very much I love him, help me Jesus...amen

about my Chad?? He wasn't perfect but he was mine & he had good traits lots of them, he always worked, always helped always shared. always was here for me, even when we would return from vacation he would be right here, proving he had been checking for our return, he loved his English Toffee & & a colo t shirt I always brought him, help us unload & park the camper. He always made friends were ever we camped as a little boy, he liked people & people liked him, I remember once he lost our hatchet & Tim was so hard on him & the neighbor camper gave Chady his. I still love you so my boy, you always kept our secret about me nicking the garage door. I feel sometimes you are still with me, for in my heart you are,

Spring is almost here, I have flowers blooming, the pretty Daffodils by you memorial in our front yard are in bloom, our pear tree is a huge white bouquet, my little birds & squirrels are such a joy to watch at our feeder, I miss you everyday Chaddy, Joe & Wyatt talk of you a lot, they love you so much, you are with Jesus now, we will all be with you & him one day. I thank you God for the precious gifts, my 3 boys & my girl, forgive me short comings I had with them, be with them & me & my husband, heal us & come into our hearts Jesus, we need & love you so. No one has ever did for us as you have done, Thank You God Amen!

my son, my boy my love, your ole Momma is now 69 years old...it seems impossible, at least you never had to see me like this, but I KNOW YOU WOULD HAVE LOVED ME ANYWAY, Jesus I pray for my son give him peace rest, & salvation, I ask it for all my family please enter our hearts accept us, give me more strength I am feeling you in my life, help my Wyatt & my Joey& Lindsey & Tim, Thank you my heavenly father for all the wonderful blessings you have allowed me & my family, protect my girl & pleas allow her to come be with me in my last days!

well you Pop turned 70 yesterday, I will be 69 the 7th, Oh how i wish you could be here with us, I am so lost & lonely with you gone to Heaven, Lindsey so far away & Y in jail. I hold onto memories & hope that we will be together again, I can see that wonderful smile, be with you & my parents & Jesus. I love you to eternity & back I wish I had done more for you, forgive my & chad Jesus, our wrongs, please let me be with my boy in Heaven again!

well Christmas has came & gone the 4th year without you Chaddy & it still hurts the same, still suffocates me, I have the memories of all our Christmas together to help me. You are with Jesus now, I am so thankful Jesus showed me you are there. Letting me see you happy in the beautiful mts we always loved together. I still get a sad feeling everytime I hear or see a big truck, you loved driving one so much, you were so good at it, I am so proud of how you did it all by yourself! I pray for you son, I want us all to be together in heaven one day. Of Heavenly Father lift my boy up, forgive him his sins, remember all the good points he has, I know you will for you are a fair just God, I know all the evil is work of the Devil, please protect all us believers, your children from him & his. Thank you for all the wonders you have given me & mine, I am not afraid like I used to be, I ask you to please be with all the little animals who must suffer & die, please enable them to be in Heaven with us for you put it in our hearts to love them, want them with us. they are your creations too, they help us get through hard times & give us joy, Thank you for giving them to us, Amen & Amen bye for now Chaddy, I love you so

Today has been a very sad day for us Chaddy, it does not seem possible You have been gone from us 4 years, you are in our heart & thoughts constantly, it is so lonely without you here, your daily phone calls, watching movies with us, always helping. making us laugh, grilling for us, you were the best!!! You left us this day 4 years ago & the pain is still the same, how I long to talk to you, cut you hair, cook for you, do your laundry, I am so thankful for the time God gave you to us, it was so wonderful to have you, my very own, I love you so, know this, forgive me for any & everything I ever did to hurt you, I am so sorry, Hug my om for me, she loves you so & grandpa too & now Matt is with you, God bless & keep you.

I miss you so much daddy. Every day you use to call me just to talk..no one does that now. I wish you were still here why do people you love have to go? I'll never get to talk to you again and it hurts so bad knowing that it will never get easier. I love you so much daddy, I know youre waiting for me in a better place.

Fall is here the nights are early & cold, it is sad the leaves are all falling the flowers dying. Another summer has passed without you my son, it is so very lonely without you! I miss you watching TV with me eating with me, making me & Joe laugh, raking my leaves, always helping. Thank you for all these things all the sweet cards & all the wonderful memories, all the bowels of noodles you always made for me when you made yours. I love you so be happy & be there the to welcome me to Heaven when my time comes. Jesus, please help my faith, come into my heart heal my mind make me strong, Amen

Our Matt left this earth & now is with you & Granma in Heaven, we loved you boys so much but so does God & Jesus love you too, they took you home, to be with them & all the family & friends in Heaven, Thank You God for our family, please hold us up. I love you so Chaddy, see you forever later, your Mom.

Happy birthday daddy! we miss and love you very much!

where do I begin how this day is so very special, Our Chads birthday, so empty now, L am cooking none of my special Liver & Onions with gravy, we are baking no cheese cake, but our hearts are full of the love & wonderful memories we have of you. So very bitter sweet, you were our joy, such wonderful times we had together, You gave me such love always appreciated what I did for you, I still have all the cards you gave me over the years, always thanking me for standing by you & helping you, telling me what a good Mom I was, but I wasn't good enough to save you, Oh how we all wanted you to stay with us. It still seems sometimes it is just all a bad dream. Joey & I talk of you all the time, it seems to keep you with us, we love you so Chaddy, Jesus give our Chad a hug & tell him how much we love & miss him. Thank you God for Chad, what a wonderful gift to us, may our memories be with him til we are all together in your glorious forever home for us!