I probably met Helga for the first time when she visited us in Switzerland with Gunther and Andrew on their way to spend a year in Germany, in the 1970s; Little did I know that Helga would become such an important person in my life. However, our families knew each other as war immigrants in New York in the late 1940’s but it was only when Gunther was married to Helga that the friendship solidified. Helga and my mother would ultimately become extremely close, my mother came to New York every year for 5 weeks and when Gunther got ill, she  stayed with Helga at 84th street. Later, when my parents moved to the US, they sealed that friendship and continued virtually,  talking every night on the phone for the last 10 years or more, until my mother passed away in 2016. I somehow took up the relay and called weekly and we would exchange thoughts on everything but the kitchen sink.

Before moving to New York in 1994, Helga was the one I would call late at night, taking advantage of the different time zones. Midnight in Europe was only 6pm in New York. I  would talk with Helga about my love disappointments, my work anxieties and small issues with my parents. I would also visit both Gunther and Helga every time I came to New York and enjoyed their company..

My conversations with Helga covered a variety of topics from fashion to cuisine to emotions, to health and more. When I decided to move back to the US, Helga offered that I live with her for a while until I figured out what I wanted to do. So on August 24, 1994 I moved in with her. Although 20 years my elder, we were like sisters, chatting through the night, watching movies on the sofa bed in the guest room together. We enjoyed eating german food from Schaller & Weber and spending time together.  It was wonderful. She taught me US etiquette, no wearing of whites before Memorial Day and none after Labor day. That Labor day, she suggested we take a trip on the Hudson river with her sister in law, Gaby on her nephew Tom’s boat. Well, the rest is history, Tom and I have been married for 26 years this year. Helga had been planning and scheming for this for years.  For that alone I will always be grateful to her. So we became relatives by marriage, even though I often thought of Helga as MY aunt! I truly loved her . She was my confidante, my only close friend in the US. Someone who knew my past, my family, my European upbringing, someone who understood my lack of understanding of the American way and who so often gave me invaluable advice. Despite all the "tribulations" she went through from growing up in Germany during WWII, emigrating to America not speaking english and dealing with Gunther's disease, she always seem to carry herself with grace and without resentment or anger, something which I admired a lot.  She was such a good listener but also had so much insight on life, common sense and wrote the most marvelous letters and cards, full of wisdom and wit.

I miss her terribly.

You will never be forgotten.