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April 30, 2018


12 months has gone by and still miss you now as much as the day you left us.

My heart is broken and will never be repaired, not until we meet again..stay happy with the rest of the family xx

Love you so so much xxxx

April 17, 2018

Hi nan

Hope ur ok up there, start thinking back to last year and you were here. I know you were suffering then but we knew you were here and now your gone.

I can’t believe it’s almost 12 months since you grew your wings and left us, I know you didn’t want to but I know you had to go, you lived life to the full and I guess I never wanted to let you go. Selfish I know but we loved you too much

Nothing has been the same since you went and I guess it never will be.

I think about all the things I should have done when you were here learn to drive etc.

Life got hectic but I will make you proud nan, I promise, know that you will never be forgotten. Sienna still remembers you now and will keep remembering you that’s for sure.

We love you millions and always will xxxx

Hope ur resting well up there, Keep looking over us xxxx

April 2, 2018

Hi nan,

I don’t know why I come on here sometimes, it’s so hard not seeing you!

Last night I dreamt about u, u were there clear as day with that beautiful I long to give you another hug, anything.

I can’t believe we are approaching 12 months since the worst day of my life so far, when you left us, to be with grandad, how we miss you and life will never be the same without you here.

Please come and speak over the spirit board, would love to know your ok and happy .

Deep down I know you are....

All my love in the world is with u xx always xxx

March 19, 2018

Hi nan

I’m sitting here with tears in my eyes thinking of you, it’s been nearly 12 months since we had to let you go and it’s still so horrible without you here. I miss you so much.

I started speaking to a wonderful girl nearly two years ago, we got really close and would chat on and off, she passed away last week she was only 36! That’s no age!:

She left behind a 3 yr old son and now her husband has got to raise him on his own! It’s not fair she wanted to live so much! Fought with every ounce of her strength and still she passed away!

If you see her will you look after her! You can’t miss the beautiful smile! 

Love you always nan xxxxx

March 11, 2018

Hi nanny xx

Happy Mother’s day, it’s horrible without you here, missing you always xx

Would do anything to speak to you or hear your voice one last time, angel in the

Sky we miss you more than you ever know x

Love you xxx

Hi nan

March 5, 2018

Sorry it’s been a month and not wrote anything on here.

I am still missing you so much and it hurts so deeply that your no longer here. Slowly trying to get on in life but there is still a huge hole which can never be filled more your not here.

I hope your watching over us, I have started doing spirit huntin and I love it, spoke to people and it’s intriguing what might or might not happen.

Well nan there is a ouija board that we do, personal messages can come through from loved ones I suppose I’m hoping that you might come and let me know your ok..happy and reunited with grandad. We know in our hearts you are but nan I would give anything one last time to hug you and kiss you and laugh with you again!

I can’t wait for the day when we are all back together, my heart is broken now you have gone and I don’t think it will ever mend, you meant so much to us all...

Love you forever xxxxxxx

Sara-Jane xxxxxxxx

February 4, 2018

Hi nan

It’s only me again, had the hardest day ever today, went to melbicks the place we always came to together.

I hated it so much, it wasn’t right, you weren’t there. I miss you nan so much, I thought it would be easy to get through but was so hard!

Sienna is growing up into such a wonderful girl, you would have loved seeing her and playing with her, it’s not right your not here. 

I know you had a good life but wanted you here longer. You were suffering though and it would have been selfish of me to ask for you to stay like that!

Our hearts are still broken and never going to be repaired I hope your resting love for you is endless.

You were and always will be my beautiful nan! Xxxxxxx

Love you forever xxxxxxxxxx

January 9, 2018

Hi my darling nan

well it’s a new year, a year starting without you here.

This time last year you were here sharing moments with us and now your gone, sometimes it still doesn’t feel real! 

I try to have a laugh at work, I guess it’s a way of coping, I think adjusting to life without you not been here is very hard to deal with, the love and laughs you bought to the family is something we will never replace.

I miss you so much, I wish sometimes that nan jean wasn’t here and you still were you had a joy for life and loved sienna and I wish you were here now to see the beautiful girl she is becoming, naughty but beautiful nevertheless.

It’s not fair, I know it was your time to go, but if I could bring you back I would in a heartbeat that’s for sure...not many more times or ways I can say I miss you with all my heart we all do.

Love you always

Miss you forever 


December 24, 2017

Hi again nan, 

Xmas eve is here, one part of the year I have been dreading more than you know, wish ever so much you were here with’s not the same, I bought some headwear and I just know that if you were here you would be playing around with them! I can’t put them on tomorrow it’s too hard!

Mom is struggling so much without you, you were her life partner in crime! Nothing but laughs when you were here! She is heartbroken without’s going to be a hard time!

We miss your smile, your laugh, your sense of humour every bit of you...

Now your spending xmas in heaven, I know your finally re-united with your love, but god nan I am not lying it’s awful...didn’t think it would be so hard! For now merry Xmas love you forever xxxxxxxxx

December 16, 2017

Hi nanny

I miss you more than any words will ever say, it’s been the longest year ever without u in our lives, your house has gone now to its new owners, it was heartbreaking to see it go, it was like the last connection we have to you has gone!

I would give anything in the world to have you here, it’s xmas soon and part of me doesn’t want to celebrate, it’s so hard u not been here , u slept last xmas away but u were still here, could still talk to u, now all we have are ur ashes and ur spot where we make sure it’s lovely for u...I really miss you!!!

U celebrate xmas in heaven with everyone else, one day we will all join you again!

Until then I will miss you forever and always xx

Sleep tight xx love u more than you know xxx

November 28, 2017

Hi my beautiful nan another month without you has been so hard, inside I’m broken I miss you so much, it’s not fair your not here, sienna should have been able to know her  grandma for longer.

She is growing up so fast and you would have adored her I bet you see her everyday, but nan I would give anything for you to be here, we miss you so so much, life truly has never been the same and it never will be.

Your house will be gone soon, to it’s new owners, they will look after it but it’s like say long goodbye all over again, the last memories of ur house, when we would spend so much time, especially when you got ill. I’m so sorry you had to suffer as long as you did life it so unfair.

I know your at peace, it just hurts so much, you were a huge huge part of our life and it’s so hard moving on, we will never forget you, ur spirit will live on forever.

Xmas is going to be hard this year, you loved that time of year, I can’t stop thinking about you and sometimes I don’t want to carry on without you. Sometimes I wish I could join u.... I know I can’t but nan you will never quote understand how much you mean to me that’s for sure.

I love you always xxx miss you forever xxxxxx

November 11, 2017

Another month without you nan, how I miss you, everything about u, ur smile your laugh I am been selfish to say that I would give anything to have you back with us.

Life is never going to be the same now your not here, it’s so unfair, I really would love to talk to you again.

I know you are resting peacefully with all the rest of family that have passed but your loss is the most heartbreaking, I really miss you..... you will never know how much I love you and always will, my angel nan forever and always xxx

Love you xxx it’s never goodbye xxxxxxx 

November 5, 2017

Hi again nan, haven’t wrote to you in a while and if people could see this they would probably think I am mad as you would never be able to read it.

Life isn’t the same now your gone I miss you so much every day, we still want you here nan and it’s not fair your not. You should be here with us xmas time your favourite time you loved it so much.

I hate seeing the decorations etc, you made xmas I really miss you; I know I keep saying it but I do; I want to hug you again, laugh with you; I kno you are at peace now,

We will never ever forget you, say hi to both grandads for me, miss you always and forever, please be here to meet me the day when I leave this world xxdqq

September 24, 2017

Nan my darling, been thinking about u so much today, it’s five months and I only wish I could take time back to this time last year; when you were here with us, I miss you so much and wasted time which we could have spent together, would give anything for one nice hot chocolate with all the whipped cream on, part of me when I close my eyes I try to forget that none of this ever happened. That we will see you again, I know it’s been silly and I know that isn’t going to happen but I wish so much it would.

I want you to be here seeing sienna grow up into such a lovely young girl, she adored you and still remembers you now, I know you had enough and you had to go, your body fought a battle and you did so well, but if I could have took the pain for you, I would, you were such a massive part of my life, it’s so hard not having you here. Seeing you laugh anything. I know nan jean is here I haven’t been able to see her were the nan that meant the world to me, you were there always, it’s horrible that you have gone, hate it, mom hates it and misses you so so much.

She is really not well her stomach is so bad and she worries us every day,look after her she needs it, I get scared that she won’t get through it, something will happen then I think surely life can not be so cruel as to take you both, 

I don’t know, hope ur resting well, we will see you again, I assure you xxxxxx

The day will come at the moment my heart is still broken, I love you nan....I know your house will soon be gone, your memories never will xxxxxxxxxz

September 8, 2017

Hi nanny,

I'm writing this after what can only be described as a terrible few weeks, poor mom is so poorly and she doesn't seem to be getting any better, I don't know what to do it's horrible seeing her like it, same as when I used to see you like it lying there in so much pain and we couldn't do anything to help you, please give her some strength to get better, I was so scared last week I thought we were going to lose her.

I don't think I could bear losing you both, I still am not and never will get over the loss of you, I miss you every hour of every day and would give anything to hear you again, want you back so much... 

I know it's selfish for me to say it but it's true, I honestly died a little the day u went, part of me is with you and always will be..we will meet again and I can't wait for the day.

Love you always xxxxxxxx

My one and only amazing nan

August 30, 2017

Hi my beautiful nan, this is the only way I can get across how I am feeling about not having you in our life... miss you nan for a second tonight I forgot you weren't around...then it hits you like a ton of bricks your not here.

Mum is in hospital tonight...she looks so poorly please look after her talk to her and stay close..nan I really miss you and always will xxxxxxx

August 16, 2017

Nan, I wish I could talk to you laugh with you, I miss you so so much and would do anything to have you back. The love we have for u is immense and every day without you gets harder, u really are the Light in our lives, it seems to have gone out . Life is still never going to be the same x miss you my angel sleep tight xxx

August 12, 2017

I miss you so much nan, it's untrue how much we all do life just isn't and never will be the same without you... give anything to see you again love u millions always will, we will be back together again one day, for now rest xxx love u xxx

July 23, 2017

Hi nan my darling, I miss you so much it hurts so badly, I miss your smile, your laugh everything about u, I would love to hug you one last time, my heart is broken without you here.

We miss you every second of every day and it's never going to change you were so important to each and every one of us, I don't like it without you. It doesn't seem right and never wlll be.

I know your time had come and you were ready to leave us, but nan from the bottom of my heart we weren't we didn't want you to go. Maybe I was been selfish I didn't want you to suffer never would I, I wish you had never got ill you loved life so much and we loved living life with you....I just miss the days of you been here so much..i like to be able to message on here and I know deep down you can't see what I'm writing.

Love you forever and will never stop xxxx xxxxx 


July 16, 2017

Hope ur ok up there...I miss you so much nan it's untrue, your were and always will be huge part of our lives and to not have you here is unbearable.

People keep telling me it gets easier....I guess I don't want it to get easier, I don't want to stop missing you and I'm never going to...I would give anything to see you again, talk to you, it's so hard nan..I really miss you...I love you beyond words. I'm trying to smile and laugh but there is a hurt deep inside knowing your no longer here...sleep peacefully nan, you have fought such ill health and I know you need to rest, your out of pain, I will see you again xxxxxxxx 

Happy birthday

July 10, 2017

Happy birthday nan, my beautiful angel in the sky, waking up this morning and not been able to wish you happy birthday has been hard, love you so much and know how much you used to love a beautiful card, I miss you so much it's untrue, we all do life really isn't the same without you in it..

Hope your resting well with the rest of your family, back with your wonderful husband, one day we will all be you xxxxxxxx

July 1, 2017

Nan miss you so much the pain isn't easing, I really would give anything to see you one last time, hug you, anything see your smile, all I have are memories now.

Please give mum the strength to carry on without you, she misses you so so were best friends....I want you back so much but it's not gonna happen.

See you again one day....xxxx love you forever xxxx


June 21, 2017

Nan having my first week off and not having you around in the hot weather has been so hard, I hope u were watching ur little girl sienna playing, I still talk about you to her she knows ur in the sky every time I ask her where u are.

I really miss you nan more than you know, we will go back to the crem tomorrow, thank you for being you all these years but my god it hurts so much not seeing u around.

Love you forever 


Hi nan

June 9, 2017

Hi nan,

Me again, just been thinking of you, miss you so much seriously, don't think this heartache is ever going to leave me you were such an important part of our lives.

Friday already, every weekend is strange not having a trip to Solihull, hot chocolate out nothing ever will be the same again xx

May 27, 2017

There are no other words than to say how much I miss you nan I don't want to live my life without you in it, you are the brightness in our days, mum misses you so much and I can see it tearing her apart now that your not here. It's not your fault nan you ended up so poorly and we all knew it would happen. I wasn't ready for you to leave and I am forever going to be thinking of you.

I would love to hug you, give you a kiss for one last time my beautiful angel in the sky, want you back here with us so much, my heart will never be were too special to leave us our lives will never ever be the same and I wish I had spent more time with you. I tried to spend what time I could.

Love you forever xxxxxxx

3rd weekend without you

May 21, 2017

Hi my darling nan,

I can't believe that this is our 3rd weekend without you in our lives.

Today we have finally got rid of that ridiculously large pool that took up most of the garden and it now looks more like a garden for once.

You would have loved been out there mucking in like you always would.

I don't know whether I seem silly chatting on here as you obviously don't get the message but it does give me comfort.

I really miss you nan more than you will ever know. We all do, mom misses her best friend and it's a struggle knowing that for now can't touch you or hear you voice. 

I know we will meet again, I really look forward to that day as the world without you is so much darker. Your smile brightened our lives, family will never be the same.

The comfort that I keep telling myself is that we all know you were suffering, in an awful lot of pain and was ready to go and see your darling husband again.

I hope so much your happy nan, peaceful and finally resting, thank you for been an amazing nan well more than. You gave me 32 years of happiness which will never be forgotten. Really do love you forever xxxxxxxx


May 18, 2017

I keep thinking of all the special times we have shared together.

I remember when I was little how we used to make an apple Eve's pudding and you used to let me lick the spoon.

Washing up used to always be a laugh with you the way we would have a water fight with the bubbles.. made you look like Father Christmas a lot. 

You used to always like to chase anyone around with a wet dish cloth so funny, I'm sure that was mom and your idea.

You two together had a right old sense of humour, still towards the end you still managed to have a laugh.

Even though I watched you pass away, we have had the funeral and seen your ashes scattered to me it doesn't seem real. 

I look at photos of when you were poorly, but still I imagine us all going out for your favourite coffee or a nice hot chocolate..whichever you fancy...

I try to smile and have a laugh, but really nan I just miss you more than words will ever say. I know they say in time things will get easier. I guess in one way I don't want them to get easier as I will have to accept that I'm never going to be able to see you.

Please know that you will never ever be forgotten there are too many memories for that. Our lives are never going to be the same that's for sure.

Mom has lost her best friend, one day though we will all meet again, it will happen but for now. Remember we love you forever xxxxxx

Miss you

May 15, 2017

I swear the days are going to keep getting harder I miss you nan, I miss your smile, your an angel now but I want you back so much.

I know this isn't possible as you are no longer with us now, but I really wish you were here to make more memories. You will be with us everyday and will always be in our hearts

I love you so so much x miss you more xxxx

May 15, 2017


Can't believe it's only been two weeks since you left us, it's such a big hole you have left in the family which will never be filled.

It hurts so much to know I will never see you again, never hold your hand or tell you how much I truly love u. I do love you more than you ever know.

Standing up there reading a poem truly broke my heart at the funeral I know you were listening I could have stood there all day talking about all the memories we have together.

We didn't need to though as they are our memories. I am going to miss you the rest of my life and I can't wait till we meet again. Life really wont be the same without you.

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