Hi darling, another day running around with paperwork so I can start work, at least it keeps me busy and not sitting here feeling sorry for myself. Please do not think I don't think of you when I am running around as you are always in my thoughts and dreams, when I wake during the night I crawl over to your side of the bed and lay there wishing you were there with me.All my love as always Janine. xxx

Hi darling, another one of those days where you take one step forwards and two backwards. The car has got another flat battery, I have had a day of running around and getting nowhere. I want you to know you are always in my thoughts or I am speaking about you, it was five months ago I lost you I can not believe I haven't touched you or seen your happy face. John always know that I love you. Take care my angel, love as always Janine. xxx

Hi darling, its a nice sunny day today but cold, I have been watching the football, waiting for the Spurs game. I am having a productive day as I have cleaned the oven and cooked three days dinners. I find it a effort to cook now as its not fun cooking for yourself, you were a pleasure to cook for as you loved your food. I have started to cry now, I start over the most stupid things. God I miss you so much. I can't see what i am typing as the tears are blurring my vision. Sending you all my love as always Janine. xxx

Hello love I hope you are ok, sorry I missed yesterday but Pat was here. I got the job thanks for being there with me. Weekend here again so sitting in doors feeling sorry for myself. Sending you all my love as always Janine. xxx

Hi darling, hope you are ok today, I have my interview in two hours, please give me luck, I was so lucky to have found a person like you in my life please stay with me now. I will let you know how I get on when I get home but i will be talking to you all day as I do every day. Love you more each day. Janine. xxx

Hi darling,I have been in a good mood today excited about my job interview. I miss not being able to bounce thing off you and sharing things with you. Love you with all my heart and soul Janine. xxx

Hello my darling, at last some good news i think, I have an interview at the hospital doing my old job, only me and another woman got this far and she lives in Romford at least im on the door step. Berni said the job is more or less mine. Hope you are alright, love and miss you more every day. All my love Janine. xxx

Hi darling, having a quiet day today, feeling sad and lonely but thats nothing different to how i feel every other day. I miss and love you so much, don't ever forget that. Talk to you later, all my love Janine. xxx

Hi darling, I have had a quiet day just watching the football. The weekend comes around so quickly and as you know I hats them now that I am alone, I loved our weekends together. I am going to Teresa's tonight so I will have some company.I love tou so very much, take care. Janine.xxx

Hello my darling, had a funny old day today, nothing goes right or is straight forward. I am having battles about work but I will get there. I miss you so very much, our friends are very good but they just are not you. I love you with every beat of my heart and that will never change, i loved being married to you. As always sending you all my love. Janine. xxx

Hi darling, hope you are well. I have had a good day out with the girls kept my mind busy, you cams up in conversation many times which was nice. Love you always Janine. xxx

Hello my darling John, I hope you are fine and enjoying yourself up there, as long as you know I am here wishing I could be with you. Housework day today so you will be pleased you are not here. I feel quiet good today I hope it lasts all day, who knows with me. Sending you all my love as always. Janine.xxx

Hi darling, I hope you are ok. I am in a lazy mood today I just want to sit here quietly today and reflect on the past and what could happen in the future. I love you with every beat of my heart and miss you like crazy.sending you all my love as always. Janine. xxx

Hi darling, feeling very empty today and tearful. I hope you are alright and behaving yourself up there. I hate living here without you, life just goes on but means nothing, it is such a chore and not a nice one. Sending you all my love as always. Janine. xxx

Hi darling woken up in a good mood but feel so lonely, once again the weekend comes and I go down hill, last weekend I was alone but this weekend I am not but I still carry my heavy heart. When you had to leave me my heart was broken in half and I know it will never heal. God knows how much I love you and I hope you do. As always sending you all my love. Janine. xxx

Hi my darling I hope you are well in what ever you are doing and where ever you are in Gods kingdom. I have been very positive today but always get tearful when I write to you, I miss you so very much life is so cold and empty without you I feel so lonely, when i will adjust to this sad life I don't know thats if I ever do want to. Please send me a sign that you are alright and that the angels are taking care of you. All my love as always. Janine xxx

Hi my darling, I am sitting here listening to music that makes me think of you, so you can imagine all the tears that are flowing and the heartache I am feeling.I would give anything just to be able to give you a hug and tell you how much I love you. John I have never meet anyone in my life that has influenced me like you have and I am so grateful, every day of my life I carry some wisdom you have taught me. Sending you all my love as always. Janine.xxx

Hi darling, another quiet day sitting indoors letting my mind run mad, I often think I am going mad I can start crying at any little thing and I don't when it is going to happen. Still waiting to hear about the job hope they hurry and let me know then ar least my mind will be active. As always sending you all my love, take care Janine. xxx

Hi darling hope this message finds you well and happy where ever you are.Another quiet day spent at home thinking about you and how much I miss you.I need to get into a routine but i'm finding it hard, one day I am up the next I am down. I hold on to everything I learnt from you and try to put it into practice. I love so much, take care Janine. xxx

Hi darling, well got through yesterday had a few tears felt sorry for myself but also thought of the good times we shared and we had alot of them. Cooked a nice meal today and sat at the table like we used to, just not the same without you. I bought a new photo frame in memory of you,I hope you like it. As always sending you all my love Janine. xxx

Hi darling, happy anniversary 9 years today, sitting here thinking of that day and how nervous i was. I am so honoured to say I am your wife, you made me the happiest person on earth most of the time, I miss you so much people tell me I will always have this pain but will learn to live with it. Thank you for the signs over the weekend and yesterday with the feathers, as I had not seen any for a few days I started to wonder what was happening and then you came through for me just as you did when you were here with me. Sending you all my love as always Janine. xxx

Hi darling, I have woken up feeling a little better today, my mind is on getting this security job instead of sitting here alone thinking of my life with you, the times we shared i miss so very much. Take care my love, speak to you soon, all my love as always Janine. xxx

Hi darling having a bad weekend but as I have said before the pain seems harder at the weekend as we used to have some good ones. I think I will have to look at moving your clothes soon, I just don't want to loose anything of yours. Feeling very low today wedding anniversary Tuesday maybe thats why I am low. Love you always Janine. xxx

Hi darling I have woke up in a positive mood and have done a few chores. I am still having a problem with your funeral plan but nothing goes straight forward in our lives. I am trying to sort out all your photos so i can get them put around the house. Miss you like crazy all my love as always Janine. xxxx

Hi darling missing you today as I do every day. I had one of your favourite meals tonight, it was nice but not the same as eating with you, thats one of the things I miss doing with you. I love you so very much, all my love as always Janine. xxx

Hi John may have good news I think I am through to the next round of my job interview. Hope you are okay.Love you always Janine. xxx

Hi darling, hope this message finds you well. I have had a fairly good day again, got in the car and drove around the estate. I have had the council at me again today so I am getting fed up with them. I have been talking about you with Pat today and I got a little upset when she went but not to bad. I love you today as I did 4 months ago and can't wait till I can put my arms around you and tell you. Love always Janine. xxx

Hi darling,hope all is okay with you. I have had a fairly good weekend, I still talk to you all the time and miss you like crazy but I hope i am coping a little better. I will speak with you tomorrow. Love you with all my heart and looking forward till we meet again, take care sweetie. Janine. xxx

Hi darling how are you today? I am still in an up beat mood hopefully I am coming to terms with not having you here with me, i will always miss you and love you can't change that not that i want to. Take care sweet heart love you loads, Janine. xxx

Hi darling hope you have settled in your new home but don't forget this is still your home and you can wander around here as much as you want. I am in a up beat mood today hope he lasts all day. I have decided to get a big picture frame to put all the photos of you in and then i can sit and look at you all the time. Miss you so very much, love you more than words could ever say. Janine. xxx

Hi darling i believe you were with me yesterday and i thank you for your support. Had a quiet birthday and really missed you. I love you more every day take care my sweet Janine. xxxx

Hi darling, another lonely day in my life, sitting here very upset with Julie she has really been someone i am ashamed to say was a friend, her behaviour is something else and I don't think I will ever forgive her. Please don't forget me. Love always Janine. xxx

Hi darling i have had such a bad day the pain is so bad i hate living without you, my life is so empty and pointless without you. Love you so very much.Janine, xxx

Hi darling, today you would be pleased not to be here with me as i am doing the house work you always hated me doing that. Sitting in the lounge thinking about you and the things we used to do at the weekend. The last weekend we had together was so nice just you and me i wish we could have another one, now i am crying, i miss you so much, my life will never be the same without you Take care my love, as always all my love Janine.xxx

Hi darling, having a quiet day today, i'm sitting here looking at photos of you and your lovely smile, that is one thing I really miss and your laugh.Hope the angels are looking after you, i'm sure they are doing my job well although they should have left it with me. I love you so much take care Janine. xxx

Hi darling, still feeling empty with out you by my side when will this pain stop,As always I love you so very much.xxx

Hi darling, I was very upset again today, trying to get things sorted without you by my side is so very hard.
Another day comes and goes but i still feel so lonely, I don't think i will ever feel the same again as I did with you, knowing I will never hear your voice see your smile is just torture.Love as always Janine. xxx

Hi my darling, i hope you are ok today. I have been signed off for another month until all the anniversaries are over with. The car has a flat battery so had to join a break down firm more money but not to worry. Love you always Janine. xxx

Hi darling, busy day yesterday putting all the decorations away and cleaning the house. Watching the football today.I have been a bit low today always seem to feel like it at the weekend especially Sunday but i will get used to it Love you always. Janine. xxx

Hi John, sorry i have not been on the site but i have been all over the place but i have been talking to you. All the holiday period is finished now so i feel a bit better.Miss you so much my darling, hope you are ok and being looked after. Love as always Janine. xxx

Happy birthday darling, i will raise a glass or two for you today.I miss you so very much all my love Janine.xxxx

Hi John, i had a few drinks last night, talked about you loads..Hope what ever you are doing its all good.Love you more every day as i did when you were with me, take care sweet love always Janine. xxxx

John my darling just to let you know i love you and i will speak to you in the morning. Good night, love you loads.xxx

John,i knew i loved you i didn't know how much until you were taken from my life.
You will always live in my heart that yearns for the day we will meet again.
Take care my sweet love always Janine xxx

Hi John, we've got through Christmas some how next hurdle your birthday that one is going to hurt but with your help it can be done.
I'm going to use this memorial page to talk to you every day, if you could sometimes give me a sign even if its to tell me you don't approve of something i would appreciate it.
John i miss you so much,i have never hurt like this in my life. I could be in a packed room but feel so lonely.
Enough of my self pity, love you loads, talk to you later darling. xxx