Dearest friend, first off you should know I haven't forgotten you and I miss you and wish you weren't dead. Second I feel like I can only let out my deepest thoughts and feelings only to you here. Rob, I'm so fucking tired , I'm fucking tired to death of going through nothing but hurt mistreatment and pain in my heart and I'm sick to death of crying. Just when I think I finally found true happiness and love , I'm only taken on a short ride and eventually that ride stops moving. I come to the same place where I started. Fuck Rob when the fuck will I catch a break. Sometimes I feel like I should be where you are. Atleast I'll be in peace.i gotta go until next time . I love u Rob .

It one of those days when Im stressed and overwhelmed and no one around I can trust or be comfortable enough to vent to.i can't think of anyone in my life I can express my feelings and thoughts to without the fear of being judged . Your the only person I've ever known that I can confide in always. So that being said, here goes... Rob , why is it so hard for a man to love a woman ? Why do men love you one minute, then decide they dont the next? If you were here with me I know I'd get an honest answer no sugar coating it. But sadly your in heaven. So here I'm in Oklahoma got my own place with my husband , working a real job, moved in my brother in law for a few months then he moved out, and same day he moved out, I move my father in law in with us. I've given unconditional love not only to my husband, but his family, loyal to an devoted to my husband, yet still, it's still never enough...2 years ago we can out here an both decided to better ourselves forget our past and let go of our bad habits if you know what I mean. My husband was so excited to start a new life , and I still remember his exact words that being tears in my eyes... He said Maria it took me finding true love in a woman that gave me the want and strength to quit and do good. That's how deeply I'm in love w u. Love conquers all. . Today I feel like my heart is hurting it feels like I'm slowly getting closer and closer to my heart breaking again, because I can't help but feel like my husband is no longer in love with me, and I know I'm not tripping because here we are and im all alone fighting to get him to get his head straight and get back on track and love me right just like he once did before. I'm sorry Rob I'll have to end this I'm getting upset I just feel dejavu just hit me, and this my friend is what I feared when he asked me to trust him with my heart because he would never let me hurt again like Chris did. Ugghghh

Dearest friend, I can't sleep tonight, and as I'm laying here in bed with my hubby Alex, I started to think and I realized I haven't wrote on your memorial page for a while now. Well friend I'm finally happy. Not only did I get off the streets and out of that bridge, but I have a good man that lives me and I love him. Real love rob not that tweaker love. I know I have a good husband and I plan to live happily ever after, just one thing friend. I know you're in heaven so do me a favor, tell Crystal she should be proud her boy has grown up into a real man he's working here has his own home and he's with his wife and taking care of his dad. Until next time. I love u friend.