Fourth of July at my big brothers was always a blast!
I surly miss going two exits over just to enjoy dinner and seeing everyone and watching my brother smile and be happy to be with his, family. of course you always have to have Tylenol because we all talked over each other and he's always act like the drama was a bit too much of all of us laughing or talking too loud or bickering. but you just have to know my brother to know that that's the way he acted he could never show you just how much he loves you or just how happy he was comma because he never gave his true feelings completely away. He always held back just a little bit. If that even makes sense to anyone but to the people that really knew him will completely understand what I'm talking about. But anyway... and to see him smile even more when it was time to light off all the fireworks that he would go pick by hand. To try to do the best show for us that he could. Of course we would all bring fireworks and food but he always tried to buy the most expensive and would always try to explain to us that the heavier the firework the better. So each year he would try to outdo his self, from the year before, in doing his, final finale show 4 us, at the end of the evening. Not to mention him out doing, him self. Every year with a wonderful brisket or ribs or whatever else he chose to BBQ that evening. I can remember those days like it was yesterday. and I miss him so much it hurts, so bad inside, especially on days like this & Memorial Day!! Because unlike Thanksgiving and Christmas, when you're all running around trying to get everything done and trying to organize the children and so forth and so on. it was more relaxed in the summer for the 4th of July & Memorial Day, were we, or should I say he... could just slowly barbecue and all get together and talk or have a beer or whatever we wanted, had more time with each other anyway and all the kids Could hang out, & ran around the backyard and played football. Or swam in his pool. well my mom's pool. That he inherited, when he began to buy her house, that was lost, in the long run. that really sucked, because my grandpa and my uncle Louie and my big brother, carl, helped my mom build that house from the ground up, after it burnt down one year. but oh well, I guess life has to go on!!! I just wanted "you" to know, Big Brother"... that, I'm going to miss you having the kids line up in a single-file line tonight and come out there with you on the rocks or the boards or whatever you secured in the backyard each year and safely light, fireworks, One at a time with your supervision, except for the older kids of course. All of us women would line up in the chairs and watch you help the kids, light the big stuff... I miss those days so much. but I know we'll be together again one day. and I know it'll be, an even better life than what we already had together. and that's the only thing that gets me through on days like this!!! I love you Carl with every piece and part of my being in my soul. Happy Fourth of July, Big Brother. I was one of the luckiest little sisters in the whole entire world to have such a wonderful and great big brother like you. I love you!!!