Margaret was
born in the city of Gdansk in Poland on January 3, 1967. She had many
fond memories of her childhood in Poland with her parents. Her father
Roman was a mariner and during her childhood years he was away at sea
much more than he was home. This meant Margaret and her mother Nelly
spent long periods on their own. Growing up in communist Poland in
the late 1960s and 1970's was difficult as there were often shortages
of basic goods. However, as Margaret's father was working on foreign
ships and often paid in US dollars she remembers that they had it
much better than so many living in Poland at that time. She had great
stories about living in Poland as a child and the adventures she had
with her Mother such as going to the beach and taking drives in their
car (a huge luxury as few people could afford to own a car in Poland
at that time). Margaret had many stories about how you often just
couldn't buy something as the store shelves were empty. She remembers
when they got on a list to get a car and when their name was finally
called after a year of waiting how they didn't get any choice on
options or colour. It was just this is what you get, take it or leave
it, and if you don't take it then back on the list and wait for
another year or more and you may have your name called again (the car
they got was a teal colour, which they were very happy about). One of
my favourite stories Margaret told was how as a child she would have
a long piece of string in her pocket when she went to school. This
was because on her walk back from school she passed some shops and if
they had toilet paper she would buy as many rolls as she could. As it
was sold by the roll and not in packages she would put the rolls on
the string and wear it over her neck as a necklace to bring all the
rolls home.
Luckily,
Margaret's grandmother lived in Canada and was able to sponsor the
family to immigrate to Canada in 1977. However, being communist
Poland, just because you had all your papers to come to Canada didn't
mean that you would be allowed to leave Poland. Her parents had to
tell Margaret that they were just going on a holiday to Canada to
visit her grandmother. They did this because if Margaret (10 years
old at the time) told any of her friends they were immigrating to
Canada and word got out, then they could be stopped from leaving
Poland. Right up until the cargo ship they were leaving on set off
from the dock, her parents were terrified that they would be denied
permission to leave Poland. Margaret's parents remember how mad she
was when they first told her that they were staying in Canada and
that she would not be seeing her friends in Poland again. Her father
being a mariner it wasn't surprising that they came to Canada as
passengers on a cargo ship. She was seasick on the voyage and
remembered her mother telling her that they were 'just washing the
porthole windows', when in fact it was the rough North Atlantic in
spring and waves were crashing right over the bridge. After arriving
in Montreal, Margaret and her parents took a train across Canada. She
had fond memories of the train trip and how she just couldn't believe
how big Canada was. She wanted to take a train trip across Canada
again and finally when the risk of COVID was lower she and her
husband booked a cabin on VIA Rail to travel from Vancouver to
Toronto in June 2022. Unfortunately just weeks before they were set
to go, Margaret found out her cancer treatment wasn't working and she
would have to change to a new treatment which could bring on various
unpredictable bad side effects, and as a result had to cancel the
trip.
Immigrating to
Canada in the 1970s was difficult and Margaret remembered the
struggles they had starting out with basically nothing. She
remembered how going to school as 'the immigrant kid' was difficult,
but Margaret was very smart and excelled at school. She became an
excellent writer and was someone people would ask to review their
essays to ensure they were grammatically correct. She went on to
University and graduated with a degree in Political Science from UBC
in 1989.
She married on
September 29, 1991 to Rod Young (on a Sunday which was quite uncommon
at the time, but Margaret was never afraid of doing things
differently). Shortly afterward they bought a two-bedroom apartment
in Burnaby. She worked for the Federal Government as an Immigration
Officer for a few years before having her first child Alexandra
('Allie') on December 12, 1994. Margaret valued motherhood and after
Allie was born spent her full time being a mother to Allie, and then
her son Henry who was born on April 30, 1998. The family lived in the
apartment for many years at a time when bringing up kids in an
apartment was uncommon (again Margaret was not afraid to do things
differently), but for Margaret being with the kids was more important
and if that meant living in an apartment then that is what she would
do. Being a full time mother didn't stop Margaret from having a
career. After Margaret had children she became a strong advocate for
breastfeeding mothers. She became a La Leche League leader to support
and help mothers who chose to breastfeed their children. This theme
of helping others was something Margaret did her whole life. This was
also when Margaret started connecting with people online. She was an
early adopter of using the internet to communicate with people to
build communities, provide support, and pass on her knowledge to
anyone who had questions. Later she became an International Board
Certified Lactation Consultant (IBLC) and did so well academically
and on the exam was asked to become one of the instructors of the
course she had taken at Douglas College on preparing to be an IBLC.
As the kids got
older Margaret started homeschooling Allie and Henry (again not being
afraid of doing things differently). She became a strong advocate for
home schooling and became very involved in the online homeschooling
community providing support, answering questions, and again helping
others who chose this path. She built many friendships online with
people in the home schooling community and valued them highly.
In 2006 the family moved to a house in Coquitlam. It was an old house
built in the 1960s and needed a lot of work, but it had something
that Margaret valued greatly. A very private treed backyard with a
stream running through it. She loved the house and the yard and never
wanted to move from her 'private park'. Moving to a house also
allowed Margaret to have the only thing she wanted other than her
family. Dogs! Margaret loved dogs. The first thing that Margaret got
for the house was a dog (to join our cat Rachel, as cats were the
only animals allowed in the apartment building). She named her Daisy,
who came from the animal shelter. A malamute mutt who under
Margaret's care quickly grew back its shaggy coat to turn heads when
they walked through the neighbourhood. She loved spending time doing
dog agility, training, or just long walks. She fostered many dogs
that needed a home, and said she 'failed fostering' as one dog she
fostered, Bear, became so attached to her that he wouldn't be with
anyone else. The only reason she didn't keep another foster 'Baby' (a
huge Maremma Sheepdog) was because Baby hated men and couldn't be in
the same room as her husband. Later she got an English setter and
named him Darwin (from a rescue of course). She loved Darwin and for
a time had three dogs (Daisy, Darwin & Bear) and a cat (Rachel).
She thought this was a great number of pets and became known as the
'dog lady' as she walked the three dogs around the neighbourhood.
After Daisy, Bear and Rachel died she got another dog (also a rescue)
to keep Darwin company and named her Olive. Darwin later died and she
looked forward to getting another dog to keep Olive company.
After both kids
started attending college Margaret decided to start the next stage of
her career. She decided to become a nurse and began taking courses in
2017 to fill in all the prerequisites she needed to apply for nursing
school. She attended Douglas College and as would you would expect
did extremely well in her courses to prepare for nursing school.
Unfortunately
this was when cancer first interrupted Margaret's life. In December
2017 she was diagnosed with Stage 1 breast cancer. She had surgery to
remove the lump, then chemotherapy and radiation to hit the cancer
with everything that modern science had. Her treatments took place
over a year and at the end had a clean scan. Undaunted (and annoyed
at the delay) she continued with her nursing career and was accepted
into the nursing program at Langera College, where her daughter Allie
was just finishing her nursing degree. Again Margaret excelled
academically and was on her way to getting her nursing degree when
cancer again raised its ugly head. In February 2020 Margaret was
diagnosed with Stage 4 terminal breast cancer. Her prior treatments
had failed, and the cancer had spread to her lungs and other parts of
her body.
Margaret was not
a quitter and immediately started researching all she could do to
slow the progress of the cancer. She never gave up and was on cancer
treatments for over 2 years, always looking at the latest research
and treatments to delay the cancer. She was a firm opponent of the
phrase “lost their battle with cancer” as it places the blame on
the individual instead of on medical science which failed them.
Margaret knew her metastatic Stage 4 triple negative breast cancer
was terminal. There would be no cure, only delay. Margaret became an
advocate for increased research into finding better treatments and
most importantly a cure for cancer. She was very involved online with
various cancer groups, and again as she had done so many times
before, was always there to answer questions and share any of the
knowledge she had to help others when they had questions.
Living in
Greater Vancouver on a single income meant there was not a lot of
money for travel. However, Margaret loved nature and going camping.
After she was married (and adding kids, cats and dogs as the family
grew) she went camping at least once per year until 2021 when the
annual camping trip had to be postponed due to wildfires as Margaret
had a lung met and breathing in smoke was not advisable. Margaret did
travel to Hawaii a few times and also a Mexican all-inclusive trip
which she won in a contest. She also visited Europe several times,
after high school and later to show her husband where she grew up. She also really wanted to take the kids to Europe and
after much saving Margaret and her husband and two kids went on a
trip to London, Paris, Venice, Florence, and Rome. She enjoyed these
holidays but most cherished the trip to Europe with the kids. There
were many more trips Margaret planned to take, but sadly they were
taken from her.
Margaret was
also an accomplished writer. She was a member of the Romance Writers
of America and while she never finished a novel I am sure that it was
only a matter of time before she got around to completing one. As her
friends online will know, Margaret did write a huge volume of
material online. Margaret loved spending time with her family and
close friends. While in person Margaret liked small gatherings,
online Margaret was a social butterfly. Margaret greatly valued the
relationships she had online. Those that knew her will remember her
numerous posts and messages which she did to advocate for various
causes, tell stories, and share her opinion. What Margaret valued
most however, was when she could share information to help another
person find what they needed to know. She valued knowledge and in
particular science, and truly enjoyed sharing anything she knew if
she thought it would help another person deal with whatever challenge
they were facing. Together what Margaret wrote online totaled more
than a novel.
In addition to
posting on many message boards, Margaret had several social media
accounts where she shared news, gave her opinion, advocated for
various causes, or just made jokes.
To describe all
that Margaret accomplished, all her interests, and all she did would
require a novel. She loved the ocean and learned to sail.
She also learned to play the guitar and also how to snowboard. To
name just a few. She was a wonderful mother, loving wife, and helped
so many people. She truly was indefatigable. It is hard to believe
she is gone.
Margaret, you
are missed and will forever live on through our memories of you, and
all you have done.
