I first met Margaret in high school in 1984. We had mutual friends
and she hardly spoke to me, and I never got up the courage to ask her
on a date. Lucky for me we both ended up going to Simon Fraser
University (SFU) and I got a second chance.
Coming from the
same high school we ended up socializing in the same group of high
school friends which had gone on to SFU. I remember sitting at 'our
group of friends couches' in the SFU quadrangle and getting to know
Margaret (she spoke to me now – things were improving). She was
smart, witty, funny and beautiful. As the terms progressed our group
of friends shrank. Some moved to other places, and some ended up on
academic probation and dropped out as they were having more fun at
the pub than I did. Fortunately I was poor so I couldn't go to the
pub that often. As the group got smaller I socialized with Margaret
more and more, and finally got the courage to ask Margaret on a date.
She said yes and we went to go see the film Top Gun which was being
shown at the university theatre by the film club (and cheap for those
with a SFU student card – I was still poor).
From then on we
were together. I don't how I managed to keep Margaret as my
girlfriend but for some inexplicable reason she liked me too. We
became closer when we both decided to transfer to UBC. I had decided
to get a degree in geology and at the time SFU didn't have a geology
department. Margaret wanted to go attend their Political Science
program. In my second year at UBC I could afford to live in residence
after landing a good summer job doing geology fieldwork up in the
Yukon. We both lived in Gage towers together (in separate 'quads')
and the following year moved in together to live in the Gage
apartments. I remember when we told Margaret's father that we were
going to move in together. His first words were “Well you will need
a TV”. I am still not sure what he meant but he did buy us a TV
which we had for well over a decade. Margaret graduated a year ahead
of me in 1989 (because she was much smarter than I was), and I
graduated in 1990. We moved into a small one-bedroom apartment in
North Vancouver, and after a year I finally realized that I had
better ask this beautiful woman to marry me so I didn't lose her.
I took her to
the Teahouse restaurant in Stanley Park. After dinner we walked down
to the seawall where I planned to kneel down and present her with the
ring that I had bought and ask her to marry me. It ended up being a
very hot day and I couldn't wear a jacket so I had to hide the ring
(in its box) in my sock so she wouldn't see it. My poor planning
continued. I hadn't considered when sunset occurred and by the time
we were at a bench on the seawall it was practically pitch black.
Undeterred I decided to proceed and I knelt down on one knee,
presented the ring and asked her to marry me. She could hardly see a
thing, but lucky for me she could hear me and even better she said
“yes”.
We were married
on September 29, 1991.
If I knew when I
asked Margaret to marry me how it would end, with Margaret dying of
cancer at the young age of 55 and the tremendous pain I would have
when I lost her, I would make the same decision in a heartbeat. All
the best things in my life are because of Margaret. Two wonderful
kids and all my best memories.
I love you
Margaret, there are no words to express how much I miss you.
Your loving
husband,
Rod
